When I sit down to write, the hardest part for me is nailing the tone of the protagonist's voice. Is it cheery? Cynical? Or everyone's favorite - Sassy.
To me tone is more than just dialogue. It's equally the writing around it. The way your character observes the world, lives in their world is what gives your character life. And through their eyes the world around them also comes to life.
This is an excerpt from my notebook for the YA mystery novel I'm writing..
ROBERT KENT RAN FOR HIS LIFE. Sweat soaked through his once white shirt. It flew untucked and tattered from his equally ripped trousers. His cuffs flapped as his arms pumped. His gold cuff links, a family heirloom, were now long forgotten. His coat was gone as well, and he was not going back for whatever remained of it.
This is not necessarily my voice as an individual, or as a writer in particular. This is for me, Robert's tone. The importance he places in his clothes, in the neatness, properness. I still wanted it to paint an image. But I also could have not talked about it...
ROBERT KENT RAN FOR HIS LIFE. There was something after him. Something not of this world. Something dark and sinister and deadly. Something the demons that tormented his nights must have made, he was sure of it. He ran, his feet flying over the muddy moors, deeper and deeper into the fog.
Yes, what I choose to concentrate on is different. I added details that make it seem that this second Robert may be slightly unstable. Unreliable. A touch more paranoid. The first Robert, you were sure he really was running for his life because he had visible signs of damage. (Though they could have been self inflicted). The second... is he really being chased?
That's what I mean by tone. And that's what I struggle with when writing a new character - particularly when it's a main character.
My main character is a woman in a fantasy / magic infused early 1900s. She is pragmatic but not humorless. At least that's what I'm hoping to paint. However, my voice does keep leaking through to her. The things I see that I want her to see, the way I would describe it or may attract me may not come across as authentic to someone of a more pragmatic disposition.
Like if I see a brightly colored flower, I may talk about its vibrancy and hue. With her, would she remark on its beauty, or notice that the splash of color seemed out of place with the rest of the room's subdued hue? Or would she go off on a tangent that escapes me right now?
I have an idea of my girl. I love my girl. But who is she really? That's what I have to find out.
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